The Barbie Telephone is plastic, unbelievable, and impractical

The Barbie Telephone, very like the doll it pays tribute to, is a factor of magnificence. However like that doll whose proportions, traditionally, are not possible, the Barbie Telephone simply isn’t constructed for the trendy world.

Even when the ultra-feminine aesthetic isn’t your factor — and it’s probably not mine — it’s a must to hand it to the Barbie flip telephone. From the field it is available in, to the interchangeable again plates, rhinestone stickers, and Barbie-fied interface, it’s a delight. The charger and battery are each pink, although they’re a lighter shade than Mattel’s trademarked Barbie Pink (Pantone 219). The telephone says “Hi Barbie!” if you flip it on. It’s the definition of committing to the bit.

The breezy enjoyable of the Barbie aesthetic, Pantone 219 or in any other case, is at odds with the precise expertise of utilizing the telephone. It’s based mostly on one in every of HMD’s function telephones, and it runs an working system known as KaiOS. The telephone is designed for fundamental connectivity — texting, calling, emails — and even features a internet browser.

In accordance with HMD, along with being cute, the nostalgic design and restricted function set are presupposed to encourage you to disconnect and spend time with your mates IRL. There are a sequence of “Barbie Tips” within the telephone’s menus that advise you on this level. 

“No need to give up the smartphone entirely,” reads Barbie Tip 1. “Find a balance between your smartphone and your Barbie Phone.” Barbie Tip 6 is titled “DreamHouse™️ Rule” and encourages you to “Make tech-free zones in your own DreamHouse. More room for fun!” By the way, Mattel says it sells a Barbie DreamHouse each two minutes. The DreamHouse retails for $199.99; the Barbie Telephone is $129.99.

The concept of popping my SIM card within the Barbie telephone and operating away for a weekend of digital detoxing with my besties sounds nice. The fact isn’t really easy. Have you ever ever tried to enter your Google account password with an alphanumeric keypad? Have you learnt the way to discover the curly brackets in T9? I’ve and I do, due to the Barbie Telephone, and I don’t want that on anybody. Typing out messages with predictive textual content is extra tedious than I bear in mind; if I used this telephone frequently, I’d most likely name individuals much more.

Except for texting, a few of the options of this function telephone simply didn’t work correctly for me. I efficiently synced my Google calendar, however my appointments seem on the flawed days for causes I can’t discern. I couldn’t get the FM radio app to acknowledge the wired earbuds I plugged into the three.5mm jack. The net browser is painfully sluggish and refuses to render The Verge in any usable kind, although I understand I’m most likely the one one that would try to learn The Verge on the Barbie Telephone.

The delight I felt after I first unboxed the Barbie Telephone was positively fading. Even the entrance of the telephone, which is usually coated by a mirror, appeared rather a lot much less charming coated in my very own fingerprints and smudges. And I suppose having a mirror on the entrance of your telephone is cute, as a result of you’ll be able to body up your selfies and test your enamel for items of kale.

However you recognize when it’s not cute? Having to take a look at your individual face each time you test for a notification. This can be a type of existential dilemma that Barbie doesn’t should endure, as a result of Barbie’s make-up is pre-applied and she or he’s perpetually twenty two or no matter. I don’t need to see my face after I’m checking texts, 4 espressos deep on a Tuesday morning with nary a drop of concealer underneath my eyes.

Barbie’s world is a dream. Sadly, the world through which the Barbie Telephone lets me escape the drudgery of recent connectivity additionally appears to be a dream. Positive, it let me take a bit of trip from my smartphone and nonetheless textual content my associates. However largely, it simply changed the annoyances of utilizing an ultra-connected gadget with totally different annoyances.

Somebody extra dedicated to utilizing T9 may most likely have an pleasing time with the Barbie Telephone. In any other case, that is only a neat collectible merchandise; one thing to take out of the field and play with for some time, however finally depart in a drawer. Type of like a doll.

Pictures by Allison Johnson / The Verge